"A man's heart plans his way but the Lord directs his steps." Proverbs 16:9


Sunday, February 28, 2010

Canaan's Story (Part one)

Just one of God's amazing provisions for this journey in our life is that I am able to stay in the NICU with Canaan. They have just recently finished remodeling this beautiful hospital and one of the luxuries are private rooms for the Neonatal ICU! So, I will have plenty of time to journal our time here...not only to keep you all updated, but also so my FABULOUS children can feel a part of all of this.
We are about 89 miles from our home and even though the drive would be doable, it is better for me to be able to be here and provide milk, hold him and just be near him as much as possible. Unfortunately since the H1N1, the other children aren't able to come and visit, so we are trying to plan "date days" with them. Our first was Valentine's Day. Phil picked me up and took me out to my mama and step-dad's ranch where we were able to have a family sleep over and eat too much candy! Thanks mama for the delicious Fried Chicken and Mashed Potatoes...they were divine!!
Also before I begin our story, I just want to thank all my "GOD APPOINTED" friends and family. The ones whom are juggling schedules, cooking meals, visiting, sending flowers and notes, planning trips to help and most importantly the ones who have and continue to pray...GOD HEARD YOUR CRIES!! I'm dying to share a few pictures first...lots more to come!

His feet are the biggest things on his little body! Hopefully that means he will be tall like his daddy!
Cool shades!

This story actually isn't just about Canaan's birth, the whole pregnancy has been a life changing experience for our family and for Phil and my marriage. I didn't realize that his birth story began back when I had first found out I was expecting until my dear friend
Tara (Too Many Kids In The Bathtub)
reminded me of it.
Nothing could hold a candle to the day I found out I was expecting our 6th little blessing, not even the move to Montana nor that we were starting a brand new life full of exciting changes.
Phil had said even after our first daughter that we would not be having any more children. I must say that this has been my greatest struggle in submission to my husband. Even with all my begging and pleading (which I tried to keep to a minimal) and Phil's no's, God has proven...5 times over...that He had a different plan for Phil and I! (I must admit that there is a LITTLE gratification in that I sort of got my way...hey, just trying to be honest!)
when I found out we would have our 6th, Phil once again said, "this will be our last" so in an act of submission, I began in my heart preparing for this to be my last.
One of the things I have always wanted to do was to have a home birth, and I figured since I had gone through 5 deliveries with no major complications that this would be the perfect time to put this desire into action. So, I made plans...called a midwife and then talked to my husband.
much to my dismay, he did not give his blessing. He told me, I could do it if I wanted, but that he didn't feel good about it and he didn't want to have anything to do with it. I was devastated, but through much prayer, I decided that I would CHOOSE to submit and to come under my husband.
If I had not done this,
Canaan's Story would be a much different one.
God calls us to submit to our husband and He has very good reason for that. Sometimes it is brutally painful, but in my case, God gave Phil wisdom that I was just not open to hearing. Had I chosen to be disobedient to God, my consequences would have far outweighed not being able to fill the long time desire of a home birth.
I will have to end chapter 1 ;) but I am writing this as a reminder to myself and as an encouragement to all wives to submit to your men.
*Thank you Tara
for reminding me of this and...
*Thank you Phil,
for always being honest with me, for caring enough to tell me and ask me things that will most likely ruffle my feathers. You are willing to sacrifice a good nights sleep in order to keep your family safe and well.

*Thank you Lord Jesus,
for using my husband and for sending your Holy Spirit to speak to us and through continually!


Raquel, The Glamorous Life said...

ahh i am so glad you get to be there the whole time with baby Canaan. he is BEAUTIFUL! We are still praying for a quick recovery and you will all be home together before you know it. call me if you get a chance i dont wat to bother you if you are busy =)

Momma Bug said...


Congratulations on the birth of precious little Canaan!

Thank you for honoring your husband and glorifying the Lord!

I look forward to the rest of your story :-)


Too Many Kids In The Bathtub said...

Oh Rossie! God has this message for women!!!! Just as you were writing this, I was writing the VERY same thing about you on my blog!!!!

You are an amazing woman! I praise God for the humility and grace he has given you as a wife!!!!!!!

Shannon said...

Congratulations on that beautiful little miracle you have there. It is amazing that God let you know there was prolem!

I have to say that I have got a post I need to do.... I have a friend that just had her 7th child with the help of a midwife. She was so blessed to have a midwife that puts her patients first... I believe that she has sent 4 of her last 5 mothers into the hospital for their births. Not all midwives are so cautious. God may very well have protected you from such a problem. That does not mean you have to fully give up on that dream, though.... (of course, only if you and hubby are both on board). My friend had a vaginal birth, hospital VBAC, hospital VBAC, then, THREE c-sections (required by new hospital rules), but now she was able to have this last one with a mid-wife and prevent surgery. I just want to share that with you. I am TOTALLY NOT trying to convince you that it would be a future choice for you. Just don't close that door completely if you still desire it and should you find yourself pregnant with a #7. ;) Your hubby could just need time to absorb that sort of thinking.

I have an issue that is pressing in on me right now... I would love more children, but I have only had c-sectins (4).... My husband has recently starting wanting more (and a larger family), yet I am concerned for MY safety and he does not want me to even consider a midwife (not that one would consider me anyway)... Like you, I will not have a mid-wife if my husband is not on board, but I am sooooo scared to keep having surgery, also. I am having a hard time "submitting" to the idea of getting pregnant without being "smart" about my health. Got any advice on that?

Katie said...

I am thinking of I Corinthians as I read your story, where Paul says that we face things in order to receive God's comfort, that we may turn around and give that same comfort to those around us. What a painful blessing this time is. We have been praying for your family--my husband has even had our kids praying for you as we drive down the road. :) Please continue sharing...

Tiara said...

What a beautiful story! Very precious! And as a wife of 19 yrs, I appreciate your honesty in the submitting to your husband. It is an area the enemy works so hard in to divide us from our hubbies.

Enjoy your precious boy, and the blessings to be had for your family. GOD IS GOOD!

Rebecca Lynn said...

please tell us more of your story and keep the pictures and updates coming...this is a dear and near subject for all mamas!!!
Bless you and your sweet baby boy with strengh and God's amazing comfort!

R. Hansen said...

Rossie, I just want to congratulate you on listening to the small promptings of the Holy Spirit that inspired you to persist that something was wrong and get to your doctor.

I am so happy that Canaan and YOU are safe and doing well. My sister-in-law died pregnant with her 6th prior to which she had had no problems and had had home births. I am just so happy that everything worked out for you and your family and that even though it is so hard to have your baby in the NICU, I am grateful that he is able to be healed!


Oh dear sweet friend, I am so glad to read your voice and be in touch if only through these chapters in your blog. What I wouldn't give to be with you and to love you in person. Our prayers are with you continually and you are an inspiration through it all! XOXOXO!!!